Greetings webstalkers and welcome to the first edition of MONSTRO BIZARRO!  Each month I will delight you with tales of mysterious monsters from around the world.  And by monsters I mean the sort that people report seeing in the shadowy corners of the “real world” as opposed to those that typically haunt the “film world.”  We’ve all heard of the Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, Mothman – to name a few – but what about the bat-like Kongamato, the man-animals known as Almas, the terrifying Mokele-Mbembe, Dobhar-Chu, the Ahool??  What about all the real-life monsters whose tales have been lost, underestimated, or devoured by larger cover stories.  These lesser-known beasts often get stomped by the commanding presence of mainstays such as Bigfoot, but they are no less interesting or lacking in horror-appeal.  But rest assured, if ol’ Bigfoot, Champ or Nessie were to poke their head out, I’ll be sure to keep you posted on that as well.
Let’s face it, we love real-life monsters.  That’s why their legends run deep in all cultures and are continually re-invented for marketing or re-investigated using the latest technology.  Even vampires, werewolves, and zombies started their careers as real horrors born of such things as medical ignorance, superstition, or religious beliefs.  Yet even in our science-savvy world, sighting of these creatures are still reported!  So let’s have a look at a few of the forgotten and/or the most horrifying monsters that lurk in the shadows of our lakes, forests, and perhaps even our collective subconscious.  This is….

Who Am I?
Some of you may know me as the frontman of the outlaw horror rock band from Texas known as GHOULTOWN.  Those that do are probably aware of my affinity for all things that have to do with monsters, horror, and spaghetti westerns.  I’ve been a fan of these type movies since childhood and have somehow managed to roll them into the themes of our genre-bending music.  I’ve penned songs for horror movie soundtracks, written the theme song for Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, and have appeared with Ghoultown at many horror conventions around the U.S. over the years.  A time or two, Rue Morgue has written great articles on the band, so some of you long-time readers may have seen those.  But enough about the band and onto the reason for creating Monstro Bizzaro…

(Proudly displaying my Bigfoot robot toy as a kid)
Among my personal interests of collecting monster toys and memorabilia, I’ve always been fascinated with reports of real-life monsters such as hairy ape-men, lake monsters, goat-suckers and the like.  Reading all those “Strange But True” books as a kid and seeing the movie The Legend of Boggy Creek at an impressionable age got me hooked.  In fact, The Legend of Boggy Creek (based on allegedly true stories of a hairy ape-like creature haunting south Arkansas) is significant for several reasons, one of which is that the movie was filmed in Fouke, Arkansas only a few hours north of my home in Texas.  As a kid my dad and I hunted much of the backwoods of Texas and near Texarkana, so it was particularly exciting (and disturbing!) to think that a monster like this might really exist.  For my young mind, it was the best of all things – getting to hunt and camp with my father while keeping an eye out for any possible monsters that my have been lurking just beyond the campfire light.

(Me with Bob Gimlin – of the famous Patterson-Gimlin film – in 2009)
To some these creatures are science, to others entertainment, and to some it’s all just BS.   But whether you’re a believer or a skeptic, it doesn’t matter.  After all, it’s only monsters… and monsters make for great tales.

Making a movie these days is more often than not a very big, expensive, and complicated goal.  You have literally hundreds of people working together in various parts of the project from the astute and goal oriented Director of the film, all the way down to the coffee getting Production Assistant who gets shit on and verbally assaulted every day.  It’s those type of people, the Production Assistants, the Set Decorators, The Grips, the Lead Carpenters: they all have just as important a role to play in the creation of a film that is equally important as any other job.  But… you know… f**k them, we came to see some of those assholes that we see in the tabloids.  They sell the movie as we all know (and hate to admit), so hows bout me and you take a journey down an alternate road of history where some of our favorite characters were played by completely different actors.  That’s right kiddies, we’ve got another addition of "who almost got the role".  It’ll be fun, I promise.
Beetle Juice (Dir: Tim Burton - 1989) Situation: Tim Burton wanted Sammy Davis Jr. to play Beetle juice.
It has been said that Sammy Davis Jr. was an icon to a young Tim Burton and this was supposed to be the project that united Tim Burton with one of his idols in Sammy Davis Jr.  However, the studio didn’t want to go in this direction and they wanted someone a little bit younger.  Michael Keaton got the role at a point in his career when he was being relegated to comedies like Mr. Mom and low budget horror films like Night Watch.  After Keaton showed his acting chops in Beetle Juice playing an iconic horror character that is insane, focused, and full of black humor, he went on to land a career-making role as Batman in… Tim Burton’s Batman.  I guess you could say that this was an extremely important step on the ladder to making Michael Keaton an A-List star.  It was the right call to make over Sammy Davis Jr., but still that would have been pretty interesting to watch.
Escape From New York (Dir: John Carpenter – 1981) Situation: The studio wanted Charles Bronson to play Snake Plisskin.
No one is arguing the fact that Charles Bronson isn’t a bad ass.  I mean, for crying out loud he played the title character in one of the most awesome vigilante justice films of all time (Death Wish).  The studio wanted Bronson for the role because he was well known as a tough guy, and Kurt Russell, the man that John Carpenter wanted had only had one starring role as Elvis Presley in a TV movie (which John Carpenter directed).  Eventually, John Carpenter was able to convince the studio that a 60 year old man running around in leather pants and an eye patch wouldn’t be the best idea.  Again, this worked out for everyone considering that it helped bond the film relationship between John Carpenter and Kurt Russell and also led to collaborations with The Thing and Big Trouble in Little China.  I don’t want to live in a world where these three movies don’t exist. 
Gremlins (Dir: Joe Dante – 1984) Situation:  Emilio Estevez was considered for the role of Billy.
Now, I don’t often like to refer to simply role "considerations" because they are so vague.  I mean, a consideration could just be a passing sentiment between two producers at a cocaine party spouting off such sentiments as "hey how bout Arnold as the 90 year old woman in that buddy cop movie we’re working on?" and then someone calls the guy stupid and it’s all over.  I added this one because the idea of a young Emilio Estevez, or for that matter, anyone that isn’t Zach Galligan as Billy seems absolutely insane.  Galligan nailed the role perfectly of an innocent and dough eyed all American boy in a town that practically craps Americana.  No strikes against Emilio, but I mean c’mon, this is the guy who was in Men at Work and the bad ass punk from Repo Man.  It would have taken Gremlins into a new direction of a ridiculous black comedy and turned it into a… ridiculous black comedy.  You know what, I kinda would want to see the train wreck that this would have become.  It may have been a glorious train wreck, like Starship Troopers.
28 Days Later (Dir: Danny Boyle – 2003) Situation: Ewan McGregor and Ryan Gosling was offered the main role of Jim before Cillian Murphy.
Danny Boyle’s well received zombie infected movie 28 Days Later is well known for not only helping to revive the zombie genre to a new generation of horror fans but also by gaining a lot of critical acclaim for the performance of Cillian Murphy as the main character of Jim.  It’s not clear why Ewan McGregor didn’t take the role, but the only reason that Ryan Gosling didn’t have the spot was because of a scheduling conflict.  I’m not sure exactly what project caused the scheduling conflict but I see three movies made around that time that it could possibly be.  It could have been The Believer, The Slaughter Rule, or Murder by Numbers.  Good call Gosling, well actually The Believer was pretty good, but still was it worth not taking a project from the man who did Trainspotting and would go on to win an Academy Award for best director?  I guess gosling wouldn’t have known that at the time, but I mean… c’mon now…. It’s Danny Boyle.
The Terminator (Dir: James Cameron – 1984) Situation: OJ Simpson was considered to play the lead role of The Terminator.
They didn’t select OJ Simpson as the Terminator because producers thought that he was "too nice" and would never be taken seriously as a killer.I swear that is true and not just a sick joke I made up

Those of you who read comics I'm sure picked up at least one copy of DC's mega event Blackest Night. Geoff Johns was presumably wrapping everything up in Brightest Day when it came to the Black Lanterns. Well it appears that this October in time for Halloween they will be back. The official blog for the DC posted the image below with simply the title: What is the Return of the Black Lanterns?
As you can see the photo features the characters who were presumably brought back to life at the end of the events of Blackest Night, Hawkman, Hawkgirl, Firestorm, Martian Manhunter, Deadman and Aquaman. Not sure what this means for their future but I'm sure we will hear more at Comic Con.

A couple months ago the news brole that Tim Burton would be directing an adaptation of Dark Shadows that would star Johnny Depp. It should be no surprise that Depp would appear in the film considering the close nit friendship the two seem to have. Depp will be playing the role of Barnabus Collins.
Today Deadline has learned that author Seth Grahame-Smith has been brought on board to work on the script for the adaptation. Seth is probably best known for his novel Pride Prejudice & Zombies. But it is most likely he got it based on his other novel Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. That novel was optioned by Burton and Timur Bekmambetov. Keep it here for more.

After they pulled their panel from Comic Con they went and set up their own event which will be taking place off site at the Regal Horton Plaza on the 22nd. Of course Aja will be on hand along with the footage they were going to play at Comic Con. Even though they won't be at Comic Con word is they are going to be doing a lot of promoting at the event.
Today a couple of posters for the Wild Wild Girls popped up online as well as an offcial website for them. Now I will note that the official website is definetly NSFW. You can see the posters below courtesy of Bloody-Disgusting.

I Spit on Your Grave has two strikes against it right out of the block: one, die hard horror fans are very vocal about their distaste for remakes of their favorite films of yesteryear; and two, the fact that it's a remake of one of the - if not the - most brutal rape revenge films ever made means that even if it's good (it is), the subject matter is way up there on the controversy barometer. So the big question is: did I Spit on Your Grave need to be remade for a 21st century audience? Director Steven Monroe (Wyvern, Storm Cell), a huge fan of the 1978 original (also known as Day of the Woman), seems to have thought not, but made the film out of a sense of necessity: at the pre-screening introduction of the film's world premiere at Fantasia he said that when he saw the rights had been acquired for a remake he had to get the directing duties if only because he didn't trust any other filmmakers to do it justice. What anybody else would have done with it is a moot point now, as Monroe has delivered a solid film that mostly stays true to the original in tone and emotion while also creatively upping the tension and dread for audiences of today.
The premise is simple: city girl writer Jennifer Hills (Sarah Butler, in a breakout performance) retreats to a cabin in the sticks to focus on her next novel, only to be brutally raped and left for dead by a gang of local country boys. It isn't long before each of them realize (too late, of course) that Jennifer didn't die and is intent on getting revenge in very creative ways. While it doesn't sound like there's much to it, the film runs almost two hours, with a good chunk of the running time devoted to the graphic depiction of the humiliation, torment, and gang-rape of Jennifer by the thugs. It's very uncomfortable to watch and yet the viewer is hard-pressed to even blink, for we know that these guys will get what's coming to them in the end (pun semi-intended...see the movie, you'll get the joke).
The subtle differences in the 2010 version actually make for a much less controversial film. This Jennifer Hills is about as squeaky clean as they come. Sure, she drinks and smokes the occasional joint in private, but she doesn't do anything that can even remotely be seen as inviting to the yokels who end up violating her, as opposed to the shades of gray in the moral ambiguity of the original. Obviously, nobody deserves to be raped, and I Spit on Your Grave 2010 makes that very clear. The biggest difference (apart from the addition of the Sheriff Storch character, played brilliantly by Andrew Howard of The Devil's Chair and Blood River fame) is the contemporizing of the revenge meted out by Jennifer. Many will say it amounts to the torture porn of such films as Hostel and the Saw series, but in this case there's a valid reason for it. And how!
As evidenced by the patron who fainted and fell down a flight of stairs at the premiere and the fan at the post-screening Q&A who praised executive-producer Meir Zarchi - who was present along with Monroe, Butler, and producer Lisa Hansen - for the 1978 original he directed while basically calling Monroe's remake a gory piece of crap (Anchor Bay is releasing it unrated, as the MPAA had ordered more than a hundred cuts to the film in order to get a rating), this version will no doubt polarize viewers and incite much discussion. Props to Miss Butler for having the guts to go to a very dark place and take on what must have been an emotionally draining role and turning in a fascinating performance. I Spit on Your Grave can best be summed up in a few words: brutal, intense, and morbidly satisfying.
originally reviewed at www.ioncinema.com, where you can also see video footage of the world premiere.  

Since I first saw her on Dexter I've become quite a fan of Julie Benz. At some point she found time to squeeze in enough time to do a horror film titled Held Hostage. Today Image Entertainment has announced that they will be releasing Held Hostage on DVD for a suggested retail price of $27.98 on September 14th.
Michelle Estey (Julie Benz) is a single mother and a bank manager, living with her young daughter Breea (Natasha Calis).  One fateful night, masked gunmen break into their home, binding both of them with duct-tape… and wiring them with explosives.   They give Michelle an unnerving ultimatum:  cooperate in a bank heist, or she and Breea will die by the explosive controls in their captors’ hands. 
After the robbery, Michelle and her daughter are left unharmed, but they are not yet out of danger. Neither the police nor her colleagues accept Michelle’s frightening story.  The facts remain in the dark while details of her abusive past come to light – as Michelle is informed, “it’s called dirtying the victim.”

Today a cast photo for Frank Darabont's The Walking Dead has appeared online. It looks like it does not actually contain all of the cast members. But it could be that this is how the show is going to start with them picking up some of the other already announced cast members later on. Check out the photo below courtesy of io9:

From Dimension Films comes word that the official site for Piranha 3D has gone live.  The Site features cast and crew information, “Survive the Attack” piranha shooting game, Wild Wild Girls ringtone and more! Experience the site at www.Piranha-3D.com. The piranhas will be released WIDE on August 20, 2010.

Sweet mother slug, look at that poster! Toronto illustrator and RM Nightmare Gallery contributor Jason Edmiston was commissioned by Fright Rags to commemorate their very special screening of Fred Dekker’s ’80s horror classics Monster Squad and Night of the Creeps. On Saturday July 17, at Rochester’s Dryden Theatre, creator Fred Dekker and Tom Atkins will both be in attending to talk about the making of the films. RM’s Justin Erickson and I will be heading down to check out the event and hang out with the folks at Fright Rags central for the day.

Starting Friday July 16th, Fright Rags will also host An Evening With Tom Atkins, showing John Carpenter’s The Fog and Halloween III. Mr. Atkins will bee in attendance for that as well. To check out the fine poster made for that event and more details on this fright filled weekend, click here.